If Happy Ever After Did Exist

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember
The people we used to be
It's even harder to picture
That you're not here next to me
You say it's too late to make it
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed
Still stuck in that time when we called it love
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of sh*t
One more f*cking love song I'll be sick

You turned your back on tomorrow
Cause you forgot yesterday
I gave you my love to borrow
But just gave it away
You can't expect me to be fine
I don't expect you to care
I know I've said it before
But all of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed
Still stuck in that time when we called it love
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of sh*t
one more f*cking love song I'll be sick

Now I'm at a payphone...

Man f*ck that sh*t
I'll be out spending all this money while you sitting around
Wondering why it wasn't you who came up from nothing
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunning
And all of my cars start with the push up a button
Telling me the chances I blew up or whatever you call it
Switched the number to my phone
So you never could call it
Don't need my name on my show
You can tell it I'm ballin'
Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could've saw
But sad to say it's over for
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now ask me who they want
So you can go and take that little piece of sh*t with you

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone
Baby it's all wrong, where are the plans we made for two?

If happy ever after did exist
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of sh*t
One more f*cking love song I'll be sick

Now I'm at a payphone...

-Payphone by Maroon 5 Ft. Wiz Khalifa

Got Skype?

Skype is becoming a hit in online video calls and communications.. or is that news considered "so yesterday"??

Man.. I'm so left behind these days :P

Anyways, anybody got SKYPE?

If so, I would love you guys (especially friends) to add me up at zackissey93

and no, there's no error in spelling of my Skype name :)

KL Part *SPECIAL*: Climax

My time to end college draws near.. and NO, I'M NOT SPOILING anything for Part 4 and NO, THIS IS ALSO NOT PART 4. It's just a short post to say it out loud that, I've graduated from college! Now all that's left is the final semester exams which of course would be easy.. if I'm done with revision (-_-)...

First of all, I would like to express that this has been a long journey (though high school is much longer) but I've experienced and learnt a lot of things about college and personal life as well. Maybe because of that, I didn't have to time to blog at all! And it is obvious that instead of writing something else interesting in this blog, I'm only blogging about my life! I'll write more on it in the official end of the KL Part series.

Okay then, wishing myself all the luck. May God also be guiding me again like last semester.

p/s: Part 4 is currently in works. see ya~

Forever Alone Day Song Dedication: Time is Over

Those who are really celebrating Forever Alone Day, here's some song dedication for you guys! Haha! This is especially for the single dudes who tried winning back someone they love but had to give up in the end under forceful circumstances. Enjoy! Song by Jang Woo Hyuk - Time is (L)Over (note: lyrics are translated)

Verse 1:
Wanna tell you but, I can't say anything

And you noticed, I'm only looking at you

As this time goes by, (I want you more)

I think the world is about to end, girl

The time we spend together doesn't pass as fast

That time with you, only seems like a blurred memory

The night is coming and the lights are turned off one by one

I miss those endless times when they didn't seem to end

What should I do baby? What do I do now?

Bridge:
This Time I've been waiting all day

For you in front of your house

Remembering all the pictures we took together

But I can't stand being here anymore, the time is over

Chorus:
Like this, it seems to be over but it's driving me crazy

The way we are, the way we are, the time is over

Everything's over, the world is over

The way we are, the way we are, the time is over

Verse 2:
Now I'm on the street bench in front of your house

We're not even making sad memories

I wish this was all just a dream

Because if it was, I'd be okay with it

But when you open your eyes (time is over)

I don't think this is over

A late night is the morning for me

I remember the memories we made

I don't know how I became like this

*Repeat Bridge and Chorus*

Girl time stopped

Maybe there's no more time left to stay beside you

Girl I'm so sorry, you're beautiful and wonderful
And this man right here will love you all his life

Be My Valentine?

Valentine's Day is here! Well, for me it's just another ordinary day for a single man like me. If you're asking me what was I doing the whole day.. hmm.. you can list down a few; a date? going out with a partner to watch a movie? Nah.. I'm doing none of that. I only had a date with college. My finals is getting near (1 more week) and finally I'll graduate from college! Not long after that I'll be able to pursue my degree in medicine.

Anyway, back to Valentine's.. so why the specific date? for non-working guys, it actually means well to celebrate it once in a year. Hey, we depend on our parents to support us financially okay. Girls, be patient until we're working men, then Valentine's Day is made available to you everyday.. and if you can't wait, leave us and find working men who you think can support you. hahahaha... in fact, it's not just about money, we're actually talking about love here, am I right? Love is a strong element in a relationship, but can also be a weak element because if it's broken, it affects you like sh*t. I'm not saying it's a bad thing.. it's beautiful.

A short fact, Valentine's Day is actually a holiday observed on February 14 honoring one or more early Christian martyrs named Valentinus. It was later deleted from the General Roman Calender of saints in 1969. Though it is celebrated in hundreds of countries around the world, it remains a working day for them. The day first became associated with romantic love, in which by the 15th century, it became an occasion in which lovers expressed their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending greeting cards (known as "valentines"). In modern times now, the most famous and popular gift for Valentine's Day is of course chocolates!

Usually men would give chocolates to the lucky ladies of the day to show either their affection or appreciation for whatever reason it is. Thinking about it, it takes me back to the old days, the time when I first received chocs from a girl when I was 13. I only started giving chocs to girls at 14 but usually for only one girl but received many from other girls as well. Since then I've not miss even one Valentine's and 2012 is the first one I've actually given a miss. Am I proud of it? Neah.. I don't feel anything, I'm kinda too busy to even think about it.. I mean, I finished a year being single and that made me proud (my single friends made me feel proud of it, seriously). I gotta hand it to one of my classmates today, as she wished me, "Oh, Zack! Happy Valentine's Day for having the most ex girlfriends in class!". *laugh out loud* that's one way to tell me I was an EPIC FAIL in relationships!

So, that is why I'm ignoring anything to do with Valentine's Day. If I'm even able to correct myself of it, I don't think I have the time to do so. Still, I'm feeling happy for those who will be celebrating their anniversary today as most couples started their relationship on this day and also for those successful married couples especially my parents which "against all odds" they remain strong together before their marriage. I wouldn't be here if it didn't happen right? Anyway, Happy Anniversary for all  Valentine couples all over the world! Not forgetting those who will start their special relationship today too.

Other than that, I began to notice Facebook peeps introducing "Forever Alone Day" alongside Valentine's Day. It's meant for those single men and women! I find it funny actually.. some are happy about it while some are sad because.. well there's tons of reasons to look at. Honestly, I'm on neither side but hey.. Happy Forever Alone Day! LOL!

LOL

Friends should be added as a Valentine asset too

What I'm trying to say is.. let every day be a Valentine's Day.. it doesn't matter who is involved, it doesn't have to be Mr. Right or Mrs. Right, your family and friends should be counted too as they are the ones who love you for who you are first before your girlfriend or boyfriend. In fact, a special relationship starts from friendship so don't forget about that!

Recovery

It's getting worse every day..

I'm getting tired of this..

I can only pray that one day I will recover..

..I don't want to fake a smile forever..

Used To

"You used to talk to me..

Like I was the only one around.."

Hi guys, I'm back again to blogging. been not have that much time and usually I've not new ideas about what to blog. Even my previous post was actually an old post that never made it into my blog until now. Things have been quieter now since then.. well, literally it was always quiet. But I never really felt lonely during the course I was studying at college. And although I was spent most of my time with classmates and housemates, I still needed to talk to someone. The person I cherished and loved the most (other than my family), I called her my Best Friend Forever.

However, it seem now like we're not even friends at all..

We argued a few times before.. especially last year in 2011. It started with a break in our special relationship, then you tried to be friends with me but being the stubborn one, I was reluctant at first. I took that opportunity to fire you back with heated words in every conversation we had. and honestly, with every conversation, I felt bad doing so but I wasn't thinking wisely at the time. The day you couldn't take it anymore, we lose contact again. I couldn't take it as well, I can't seem to accept being friends with you. It would be too painful for me to bear. but it's not like the first time I have to bear with you.

when your mum have to come into the picture, we reconciled and we became friends again.. in which I was still not being entirely honest about it. I was again trying to break this all up. Slowly I began to change my mind and then opened up more to you but clearly still holding back many things that I wanted to say. I soften up and became more comfortable in this "friendship". I guess it's because it reminds me a lot of  us when we're together doing things. Though, the only part missing was you pissing me off *giggles*.

All the time we were chatting, I tend to forget that you're already with someone else.. or maybe I just didn't care. I understand that it's kinda not right for me to say or do this but we're just "friends" right? I mean.. at least that's what you think. Usually, I would try to tell you hints about what I thought about all our conversations.. that this may be the last that I'll be able to contact you like this. because when we'll finally meet, it will not be the same again. I have to "control" myself from then onwards when that happens. You know, for the sake of your current relationship to be a happy one. It is my tendency to make everyone happy. Maybe that's why I'm always feeling sad and alone. Still, the one thing important to me, is that you're happy.

Perhaps that I let my feelings get the better of me.. it was a stupid move to let you know about my feelings towards you. I was mad, because you didn't know.. again I forgot about your current relationship. You have to push me away, all the friendship that you offered me are all now taken back. I tried to change your mind but as usual, I have to let you go. I felt worse than how I lose you before.. I don't need to say more; being the emotional guy I am.

You are going to read this too after I posted this.. therefore, I got something to say to you; what you did was right when you pushed me away. It was the best decision possible, I don't have anything against it if it were for the best. However, just letting you know that, I'm always available to talk to whenever you're free. Otherwise, I will just ignore you (with good reason).

please do not take pity on me, simply understand why some friendships are important to each individual. I failed to maintain mine, I have to live with that..

"Can we get this back..

to how it used to be.."